1. Tarzan's Treehouse. It used to be The Swiss Family Robinson's Treehouse in Disneyland. I refuse to climb it now that it's been redone. One day I will get over it for the sake of my children blah blah, but until then, I find it an abomination.
2. Mr. Pibb. Anyone who thinks it's a Dr. Pepper replacement clearly practices taste-bud-abstinence. I am tired of the furrowed brows every time I am offered it in place of DP and I pick Coke instead.
3. OB Tampons. You have got to be kidding me with the whole no-applicator thing. Their trademark "Just try OB and you'll see!" should be replaced by the less-catchy but more appropriate "Just try OB and become Lady MacBeth!"
4. Five for Fighting. Stop whining, grow a pair, and prove that you're more manly than Kermit the Frog.
5. "Water for Elephants." How does this movie exist outside of a Conan O'Brien sketch? A Depression-Era drama about a boy in his late teens who is orphaned after a car wreck kills his parents and is forced to hop a circus train where he rooms with a dwarf and a dog, falls in love with a married horse performer, and escapes the circus with several animals to start his own circus. Who is taking this seriously?!
I would rather wear an OB tampon as I climb Tarzan's Treehouse while sipping a Mr. Pibb and listening to Five for Fighting than waste a minute of my life watching "Water for Elephants." This declaration has therefore sealed my fate that the first boycott I break will be for that sham of a film. Lord help me not to own the DVD.
I am SO with you on the first three! Although I only practice boycotting one and three because when forced to drink Mr. Pibb at restaurants, I will. This is only because I don't like cola and well...when I need caffeine, I need caffeine. :)
ReplyDeleteAllie, are you anti- iced tea? That's always my back up. =)
ReplyDeleteSo, how did you like Water for Elephants?